.:shy:.

my little book worm

i will admit that i'm about to share a very proud moment as a mother.

but it's not with any conceit. it's because i usually wonder how much i'm screwing up my own kid.

parenting is hard. period.

every now and then, there are moments that remind me that i'm not doing half bad. that while i'm certainly not perfect nor ever will be, the kid is doing alright.

last night was one of those moments.

just to back-track, chaeli was a bit slow on learning how to read at the level she was suppose to be at. not because she couldn't do it, but because she was in an environment for JK and SK that didn't give her a kick-start. which really, wasn't a problem for doug and i. we were actually trying to allow her a childhood before she was forced to grow up five times faster then normal once she started grade one.

of course, due to a crappy school in our area with no before/after childcare support what-so-ever, we made the leap into enrolling her in a private school... one that was slightly more academic and had her put into a grade two and sometimes three level scenerio.

this caused massive panic attacks for me. i questioned myself day in and day out - was this the right move to make? am i putting too much pressure on her? perhaps i didn't worry about this daily - but it was on my mind a lot in the first month and a half.

well, last night, she was asking me if she could have some extra time to read that night. not wanting to ever take away the joy of reading, i told her that i would allow her 15-20 minutes before we had to get ready for bed.

and that's when i discovered that she was 2/3rds into her chapter book. granted, it was 'captain underpants' but as i watched her read, i could tell how much she was into it. she was laughing at the funny parts and serious at others. she wasn't just reading but completely absorbed into the story. so i asked her later, which book she was going to read next. her library shelf has a section where she organized all her chapter books - she showed me the next two she wanted to read with sheer excitement.

i think what made me proud was that she was showing so much enthusiasm. and i know i didn't get into reading until much later. grade three was probably when i started to enjoy it.

it's a valuable tool. i'm happy she's picked it up. reading has been a way for me to gain so much more knowledge. it makes me think about things and the way the world is... the way people are. and of course, the ability to escape... even if just for 15-20 minutes.

little shadows

after reading my friend's post about how one of her twins followed her into the powder room when she went to quickly wash her hands and had accidentally left the toddler inside the powder room - she didn't know she had a little follower - with the door closed (found quickly by her husband, though), i'm reminded of a similar situation.

it wasn't with chaeli, but with hobbes.

when we first adopted him into our lives, he was very clingly. we couldn't walk anywhere in the house without him following directly behind us.

one day, i was rushing around the house doing choirs. doug was home and i just assumed that hobbes was with him as at one point, i realized i hadn't seen the little pup in awhile.

but to double check, i called down to doug, who was in the basement at the time, "hey - have you see hobbes? is he with you?"

expecting doug to say 'yes' i was a bit surprised when doug replied back, "no - i thought he was with you."

so we quickly went around the house calling and whistling for the little pup, all the while, wondering exactly what sort of trouble he's gotten himself into. then i heard doug laughing from the laundry room followed by, "found him!"

apparently, he had quickly followed me into that room. when i left, i had closed the door as i usually do, leaving poor, wee hobbes all alone. he might have whimpered but the washing machine droned out his sound.

oops.

anyway, this friday, hobbes turns one. my aunt wants to have a little family party for him which should be interesting. i remember we were made to stand around her dining table to sing happy birthday to their shihtzu who, sitting at the end of the table, just looked around the room all confused as if to say, "why the hell are they all staring at me and singing that god-awful song?"

i love hobbes. but i don't know if i want to sing to a dog. again.

ikea, scones and skype

we spent this saturday at ikea, purchasing a couple of TROFAST cabinets and wall shelves (with an assortment of different colour and sizes of bins) for chaeli's room.

the assembly and re-organizing (which included more sorting and chucking) took up a good chunk of the day. but it was worth it. with just one wall shelf to put up (which we've decided to leave empty and use as a book shelf instead), her room is pretty close to being organized. i've shown her where she can find all her toys (mainly one cabinet) and all her craft supply (one wall shelf and top bins of the other cabinet on the other side of her table). i know it's still wishful thinking that she'll keep it neat but so far, she seems to have no trouble putting things back where they belong. it helps that she can take the bins out completely on her own so that she can really see what's inside. and it's just a matter of putting the bin back inthe empty slot.

i recommend investing in this storage system if you're a parent. ikea is not the most high-quality type of furniture but lets face it - it will outlast the school age years.

sunday afternoon, we went over to di and rik's place for high tea with the rest of the posse. and i really do mean the whole posse! even though rita and harry are in the states, and ada and hoa are in vancouver, we made sure to skype them over.

on the way home, i said to doug that even though i know this is so not new, it definitely was an interesting situation - to have people there.. virtually at a party. it was a neat concept though, of course, i would have much rather have had them there in person but i suppose this was better then nothing!

anyway - doug baked some scones which were pretty much fresh out of the oven (we were late) and still warm when we got to the party.

here's the recipe.

on parenthood and music

as parents, we try to be responsible - we want to raise chaeli on the right path in regards to the importance the various paths of life.

one of such paths involves having a decent and diverse taste in music. but lets face it - i'm sure this has always been a challenge for parents worldwide. and it always starts with us holding our little, tiny baby in our arms, cradling him/her while saying, "just you wait and see... mommy's going to teach you all about david bowie, the smiths, the cure, just to name a few." and of course, it depends on the parents are the era - those musicians and bands are replaceable - but those were my ideals.

at the beginning, it seemed to work. i spent the first two years of chaeli's life playing a lot of classic bowie. by the time she was 2.5, she was walking around singing 'scary monsters' and when that day happened, all i could think was, yes! i did it! sucess! hahaha!!!

the problem is that no one can predict what external forces lies ahead, just waiting to crush that winning path you've worked so hard in defining for your children. and when that one variable comes into your household, it's amazing how little power you have to stop it's evil and malicious influence on your child.

it happened to our household a couple of months ago. we were watching tv and something about justin bieber came on.

chaeil: mommy - do you like justin bieber?

me: no! he sucks. remember that.

chaeli: but i like some of his songs.

me: you do? since when? oh no - you don't think he's cute do you? please don't tell me that you love him and want to marry him some day.

chaeli: ew! of course not! he's too old for me - he's a teenager!

me: yeah... right... that's right! you just remember that. he's a teenager and way too old for you.

chaeli: i'm just talking about his music.

me: okay. well... i still don't think he's that great. plus he needs a haircut.

chaeli: mom, he's not that bad.

and there you have it. see? all that work for the past seven years - gone. it was a sad day for me.

 

randomnous valentine

• i'm not a big fan of valentines and if it weren't for chaeli, i would do anything for this day. but like a good mom, i did whatever needed to be done to prep for her valentines day party at school - including a 30 mini spring rolls contribution for their food list. as for doug and i, we did get a chance to go for sushi this past saturday while chaeli stayed with my parents. it wasn't for valentines - just a regular date-night/outing because we haven't had one for so long.

• i'm glad that justin beiber didn't win last night. nothing personal against the kid - well, except for his hair - but it felt good to see esperanza spalding take the award for best new artist. she might have not won the hearts of teenie boppers more interested in getting a date with bieber, but her talent and lovely personality was definitely dserving of such an award. bravo, esperanza! bravo!

• so i got chaeli to point out her new boyfriend - i must say, he's the best looking kid in class. way to go, chaeli! but i learned that he's also one of the students that gets into trouble often. so young and she's already going after the bad-boy image.

• our roof is leaking again - propery management didn't fix it as they said they would two years ago and so now, we're looking at a worse leak then before. i've been spending a lot of my free time communicating back and forth with them - and basically nagging them to do it right this time. they are responsible for not only fixing the roof but also fixing any water damage the leak might have caused (and not just the cosmetic parts of our interior - but any material inside the walls and/or attic that the water has touched so they are not hotbeds for mould spores).

• we have now acquired an ipad and have been wasting our time with plants vs zombies.

we thought we were safe...

chaeli: mommy, you know what?

me: what?

chaeli: justin asked me if he could be my boyfriend.

me: oh really?

chaeli: yeah.

me: and what did you say?

chaeli: i said, "yes!"

me: exactly how did he ask you?

chaeli: he said, "do you want to be my girlfiend?"

me: and this is for real?

chaeli: of course it is!

locks of love

we started chaeli's birthday with a trip to the hair salon. she had a 10am appointment to get 10+ inches chopped off.

the hair will be donated to a an organization called locks of love - a non-profit organization that creates wigs for children undergoing treatments that causes loss of hair.

chaeli loves her new short and very chic do. they basically layered the bob so that it's shorter in the bag. we all love it! what a great start to a great birthday. i hope my 7 year old remembers this day in years to come.

she definitely feels great knowing she's going to help out another child out there. that alone made it all worth the experience.

rest of the photos found here.

a sort-of new year's resolution

so it's the other new year for me - the one that follows the moon and is symbolized by the cycle of animals.

 

this year, it is the sign of the rabbit. which i find very fitting.

 

it is the year that brings on patience because that is what the sign of the rabbit is strong for. which is exactly one of my weaker areas. i have less patience then the average person. but believe me, i've been fine-tuning this area for years and i'm finally starting to see a real difference from where i am now compared to a few years ago. i do, however, still need to exercise patience when it comes to parenting.

 

it is the year of peace - rabbits do not like arguing. they seek peace probably more then any other animal. i definitely want my year to be about peace. to continue finding that balance but strive for as much bliss as possible.

 

it is also the year of being good to others because that is what rabbits do best. they are seen as quite selfless, even though they will weigh the pros and cons of any situation before making a decision. but there reason for doing this isn't selfish. it's because they know that if the outcome is not good, it's best not to proceed. especially if in the end, there is not a win-win situation. well, i definitely want to continue doing things out of clarity and consciousness.

 

i supppose the above is somewhat like a new year's resolution - though as always, it's more a stamp on what i would like my path in life to be.

so ready for the weekend...

this is my 3rd day back from being sick - while i'm definitely much better then i was at the start of the week, i still feel extremely weak.

this is what happens to people like me. we go-go-go and have the amazing strength to hold off on getting sick. as soon as a big moment in our lives has passed, that's when it hits us like a ton of bricks. i've seen this happen to me over and over again.

at the same time, it does give me a good enough excuse to slow down. at least until i'm back to 100%.

so this weekend, we've got some fun family stuff planned.

to start, we're thinking of taking hobbes to an indoor dog park. it does cost us $7 (for the whole family) for 1.5 hrs but it's worth a try. we'll also be having a belated robbie burns day celebration, followed by family movie night.

tonight, we're probably just going to order in pizza and have family game night.

so looking forward to this weekend!

snubbed ubb

ugh - my nose is totally stuffed, my sinuses are achy and my throat is a bit phlegmy.

the worse? i had the weekend all to myself - but how did i celebrate this much needed solitude of mine? by getting sick. not ideal at all.

but anyway - i tried to salvage the alone time as best as possible. even though the majority of my weekend was spent in bed.

doug and chaeli had a last minute trip to t-bay to see my in-laws. i chose not to go - work has just been crazy with a lot of overtime. and even if i didn't have to put in some overtime this weekend, i was just completely exhausted.

hobbes stayed with me though. in fact, when i started to come down with this cold, he really stayed with me. for most of sunday, he was glued to the side of my leg. faithful dog - but a little bit of a space hogger.

i managed to at least do two things from my list of me-time things to do:

1. finished watching the final season of the L Word. I was actually really excited that the first episode showed them wheeling away a very dead jenny from bette's and tina's house. unfortunately, i still had to endure the annoying jenny as the rest of the episodes was a built up to the climatic ending. it's not just that jenny is one of those characters you love to hate, but in all honesty, as much as i loved the show as a whole, i wasn't at all convinced that the jenny character was believable enough. perhaps because her persoanlity really went through too many different transformations from season 1 - i felt as if the writers couldn't make up their mind what to do with her. and i also found it really hard that all those other ladies actually stayed her friend for that long. if it were me, i would have kicked her out of my life a lot sooner.
2. watched twilight eclipse. fun and an improvement from the first two movies. but when jacob first makes his appearance in the movie, they did that cheesy soundtrack in the background. that almost killed the whole thing for me. overall, it was entertaining but really, what i'm truly eager for is part I and II of 'breaking dawn'. i have a lot of questions and curiosities of how they are going to illustrate the last book on the big screen.

okay - i'm hoping another night of sleep (good sleep) will allow me to get back to work tomorrow.